Parramatta Eels 20
Wests Tigers 21
I meant to take my son to his first Eels game today, but it didn’t work out. I think next week I’ll introduce him to soccer.
As the Parramatta Eels ran out from the tunnel under a pyro show that only half went off and through a sorry looking guard of honour made up of less than 50% of the clubs living Hall of Famers, they must have taken the half-arsedness of it all as a challenge. Half-arsed certainly sums up their efforts tonight.
They were soft, they were dumb, and they got beaten by the worst team in the competition, at home. Now I have to find something else to do with my time this week, because I sure as heck don’t want to hear about this game again, thanks.
Yeah, whatever.
I am contractually obligated to give an MVP award, so I’m going with the player who contributed least to this train wreck of a loss. According to NRL numbers, Hayze Perham was on the field for 12 minutes, 37 seconds, narrowly edging out Mitch Rein‘s 12 minutes, 54 seconds. Also, Hayze hasn’t dropped the ball his only two attempts at running it. Congratulations Hayze, you da MVP. Most inVisible Player.
Clint Gutherson
1 – Fullback
Fair warning, I’ve got the big red FAIL pen out for this one, but the King wasn’t the problem tonight. Bonus points for mocking Daine Laurie, though I’d have preferred he could have mocked him at full time by pointing to the scoreboard.
Will Penisini
2 – Left Wing
Turns out, wing is a specialist position. Will Penisini found himself in the wrong spot on both sides of the ball a few times at great cost. His ruck work was good and he got his hands on the ball more often than usual, and at least he survived the curse of the “2”.
Tom Opacic
3 – Left Centre
I don’t want to be the guy who kicks somebody while they’re down injured, so I’ll just say to Tom Opacic I appreciated that he thought getting a trainer to rub an elbow into his backside would fix him.
Marata Niukore
4 – Right Centre
It was so good to have Simba back. Marata Niukore took a few massive charges to start a roll in the second half, then promptly limped his way back to centre like somebody who hasn’t played footy in two months. You weren’t the problem today, little lion man.
Bailey Simonsson
5 – Right Wing
I’m not hating Bailey Simonsson as much as I used to.
Dylan Brown
6 – Five Eighth
There were times today when I thought Dylan Brown was treating his passing game like a toddler that learned a new word, using it far too often and in the wrong spots. Then he tore through the line and got the Eels back into the game. He’ll get the balance right at some point.
Mitch Moses
7 – Halfback
If Mitchell Moses hasn’t already crossed Reed Mahoney off his Christmas card list, he’ll be walking up to the headgeared imp in the dressing sheds and making a very pointed gesture of running a thick red pen through his name.
Mitch looked great early, but as the senior half and the big name in the squad, he needs to be responsible for the composure of this team, and that just wasn’t there today.
RCG
8 – Front Row
You were okay out there Reg.
Reed Mahoney
9 – Hooker
Reed Mahoney played like Trent Barrett was already coaching him this week, first ruining a good exit set to start the second half by kicking early, then going one better by following two great runs with a 40/20 attempt I nearly caught in the stands. I just hope it was “trying too hard” errors and not “I have no idea how to read the moment in a game” mistakes.
Oregon Kaufusi
10 – Front Row
Just stop dropping the ball, would you?
Shaun Lane
11 – Second Row
I’m not going back and watching a replay of this one, so if Shaun Lane did anything good out there tonight I’m sorry mate, I didn’t see it. I only remember thinking a few times “imagine how good Shaun Lane would be if he didn’t play in slow motion”.
Isaiah Papali’i
12 – Second Row
Easily the quietest attacking output of the season from the future Tiger, against the Tigers. I had the corkboard and red string out when Isaiah Papali’i spilled that ball, and while I’m not going to cry conspiracy just yet, we needed him tonight and he wasn’t there.
Nathan Brown
13 – Lock
Nathan Brown had a few moments where he’d angle a run off a quick play-the-ball and make good metres, but it never amounted to much. It was one of those games where he was trying hard, but he was bumped off in plenty of tackles and threw some questionable passes.
Maka Makatoa
14 – Interchange
I watched this game with my old man, and he attributed our recovery late in the first half to Makahesi Makatoa coming onto the field. Sure he put it as “who’s that bloke with the stupid hair? We’ve been better since he came on”, but it was the nicest thing he said about anybody in Blue and Gold all day.
Ryan Matterson
15 – Interchange
Ryan Matterson was busy and racked up the numbers, but gee would I love to see a “Ryan Matterson revenge game” one day, rather than a “Ryan Matterson didn’t get knocked out, that’s the only positive I can take from this one” game.
Mitch Rein
17 – Interchange
I’m surprised Mitch Rein has had as long a career as he has considering he can’t run and hold the ball at the same time.
Hayze Perham
16 – Interchange
Look how happy Hayze Perham is in his picture. I wish I felt like that today.
There’ll be plenty of time for actual analysis of what went wrong tonight, but I’m putting this one down to the Eels not being able to tackle. They made Alex Twal and Joe Ofahengaue look like David Fifita and Viliame Kikau, Jackson Hastings like Peter Sterling. On a day the club was supposed to celebrate its 75th anniversary, it was a disgraceful, gutless effort.
The wooden spoon favourites beat them in effort and intensity, then beat them on the scoreboard. Take a good look at yourself Parramatta, and come back better.
Until next time, stay slippery Eels fans.
Gol
Images and stats courtesy of NRL
The positive is every year that we have won the Easter Monday game we have gone on to not win the premiership.
I hope the Mitch Rein experiment is over I really do.
I vowed to not blame BA as much this year but his selections this week showed a lack of respect to the opposition if I was Madge I’d of said as much to fire up the team. Lose your winger and front rower put in a centre on the wing a second row at centre. Play 2 interchange forwards have a specialist hooker with zero utility value on the bench alongside a outside back/utility I’m holding BA accountable for this one.
The other plus is its better to loose a game like this to start to fix problems as opposed to scraping home a win a papering over the cracks.
Biggest worry was seeing Reg limping with Ice on his foot after the game
I think you were too kind on the ratings to be honest
I thought to harsh. Reed for instance tackled himself silly , mowing down everything that moved.
Reed was woeful. Killed momentum numerous times, refused to run from dummy half and engage the markers, terrible in defence. This is why many fans are not mad hes leaving. Not a 650k per year hooker.
With all due respect , terrible in defence , wat drugs are u on, 50 odd tackles , reasonable mtrs plus post tackle mtrs , not his best game but I wld not swap him for anyone except possibly Harry Grant. I love the little fella and I suspect his coaches and team ates luv him to. Have a look at the replay and see if u don’t change ur mind a little, these guys can’t b expected to nail 40 20 s every week
Reed’s grade is purely for his dumb plays: those stupid kicks including the 40/20 attempt, then messing up the field goal play. Most hookers can tackle themselves to a standstill, but he was lost out there in the crucial moments we needed a calm head.
This is the best thing to come out of this game. Sure the lads set a low bar … but still.
On a serious note, premiership contenders don’t lose these games. When did Melb last bottle a game against a cellar dweller side? Obviously a bit of a melodramatic comparison, and this is only 1 game in a long season, but geez that was ordinary stuff. We should have put on 40 unanswered points. I just can’t get my head around how badly they can play. The weekly inconsistency and poor patches of footy really need to be sorted pretty quickly, otherwise we will be making up numbers again come September.
Don’t worry about Melbourne, we beat them last 3 games.
I’m so sick of the selections of the coaching staff. Rein should not be on bench. Lane is not a starting back rower. He is a bench player at best. Why BA shifted penisini to wing instead of playing a winger is beyond me. Penisini and co. were caught out defensively many times and it’s not their specialist position. Starting kafusi was always going to backfire – the bloke can’t dominate a tackle and is always left strewn in the tackle instead of getting back to marker. Not to mention his terrible hands and handbrake when running at the line. I think this team is kidding itself with its defensive efforts. We have been winning in terrible fashion – missing a million tackles and relying on cover defence to make up for it. I’m very very disappointed because I (along with many fans) knew we would crumble at the occasion – expected to win handsomely and falter as usual. Pathetic stuff and it has happened over and over again over the last few years. So much lip service from ba and co. about “playing parra style” and “completing sets” etc but we all knew parra would come out soft expecting to win by 40. Onto next week but this team needs to stop getting ahead of themselves and show some self respect in their defensive efforts instead of being so loose around the ruck and getting stripped on edges with impunity.
Great post.
I concur – wing IS a specialist position ! Will Pennisini is a great young player but Nofa gave him an absolute bath and that is so unfair!
I know we have an injury problem with our backs but find a winger and play him on the wing – don’t try and manufacture a centre to play wing !!!
At the end of the day Maguire outcoached his friend.
Our biggest problem (and it has been all year) is our defence and unless we fix this up we are just going to be window dressing.
Waqa being the exception to this. He’s a better Winger than Centre.
Could not agree more about our Defence Spark, it seems to be quite poor and loose…..something has to be done and the coaching staff need to sort this asap.
The only positive for this is, i am glad its now and not at the back end.
BA also deserves an F for selecting that anorexic bench. How many seasons has he had yet he is the worst when it comes to using his bench rotations time and time again. Seriously why wouldn’t you put Greig and Cartwright there instead of Rein and Perham?
Why wouldn’t you start Perham on the wing and Niukore in the 2nd row or bench?
Watching Reed again, if I was having a Roman Orgy , don’t think he could be trusted to organise the grapes. An elite 9 he is not.
Hahahahah
Why is Rodwell not in the side, why is he picking Jakob on the bench when our forwards lungs are screaming for oxygen. I have no faith in Brad Arthur anymore.
Can’t disagree with the grades.
Such a scrappy game and even then there was an opportunity to win it but for the shemozzle that was the field goal setup/attempt.
Lane was just awful a and Kafusi isn’t a starting prop. Time to give someone else an opportunity.
Poor choice with Penisini on the wing against two hardened NRL wingers, albeit he did look threatening when he returned to the centres.
Panic plays, short dropouts to put themselves under more pressure?
Last year I thought the bench was our strength but today it offered little.
Big crowd, legends in attendance and a rubbish effort and deserved result.
I’ve got to also give BA team selection a big F. Only having one prop on the bench with a winger and hooker that he gave next to no time to. Picking a gun centre on the wing only weakened two positions.
I’m a big supporter of BA for what he has done for the club and have to say that today underlines an issue.
whilst we are short on wingers, it’s such a specialist position that anyone that has coached knows this to be critical, shifting a proven centre to the wing never works and it showed. The bench was a distaste and looked it before the game, Kaufusi was awful and has failed when asked to step up. Maloney is getting paid as an elite 9 next year, today underlined he’s decent . That’s not the first time he has failed when needed to organise a field goal or a final play.
Hate to say it, but the coaching set up failed today and the bench was a disaster , from not utilising Greig, Rodwell or even Cartwright was questionable. A Katoa is a workhorse who fills in , but does t do,I ate.
Was a definite fail from the coaching angle, and let’s face it Moses should have done better with kicks at the end of the game. The nark in me will now watch for Reed to join Addo Carr and Burton in a career going nowhere.
That was so friggin dreadful to sit through at a full stadium, no excuses can justify what was served up, shit show extra ordinaire.
As far as Moses’s kicking at the end of the game, I noticed for the last 20 mins that nobody could be bothered setting up a block near the play the ball. Every kick was under pressure, so some of the blame there should be towards the lazy forwards.
Mahoney deciding to go to Papalii on the fourth when Moses was waiting for a drop goal confirms my happiness that he is going.
The crazy thing is, the Dogs are paying $700k + for 4 years, that’s enormous for a good 9.
I’m filthy. We lost that game entirely between the ears. You can’t tell me the coaching staff didn’t spend the week telling the players they needed to come out, complete well early, and not get ahead of themselves based on the Tigers season to date. They didn’t take it on board.
We got good early ball, botched the opportunity, but acted like those opportunities were just gunna keep rolling in without effort. Yes, we had players out of position. But they acted like the opposition weren’t going to be good enough to target them. They were. We still should have been good enough to absorb that, play our own game, and get on top.
Putting the blame on the coaching staff is a cop-out for the players. As far as I’m concerned, this is firmly on them particularly the senior ones (RCG and Niukore excepted). Reed made multiple terrible decisions. Gutho and Moses couldn’t pull the troops into line and settle them down.
Go do some soul searching boys, learn some humility, and listen to what you’re being told by the coaches pre-game, not the media and fans.
Good coaches dont pick centres on the wing and that bench make up. Arthur has to go.
Rubbish. Not one person before the match said “that team can’t beat the Tigers”. The selected team had the requisite skills. They didn’t perform.
The commentary from Ginnane is definitely a F as well. Deadset.
I don’t know what was worse, watching the Eels today or listening to that spud.
If RCG is injured I’d much rather see Makatoa start with Greig or another kid (Rodwell??) on the bench with Kaufusi in Reggie’s.
I think Perham showed enough to nail down the bench utility spot. Mitch Rein should never be on the bench again. He actually got hooked from a side that was playing that badly.. go figure.
The Eels need to pick the best SPECIALIST winger they’ve got.
I get they’re running out it cattle but if they do the basics right they beat the Tiger. That’s all that was required to win today but they couldn’t get that right.
Btw I really dislike Ginnane. It kills me having to listen to him.
Ginnane is a massive punish to listen to, I believe he’s a Tigers fan as well so it would have been especially ordinary. I’ll never find out, I’m not planning to rewatch this one.
Tigers the better team today. Parra just seemed unable to compete. It seems like Moses is struggling with his right leg a bit. Thoughts on wether you’d like him to share some of the goal kicking with Gutho til he’s 100%.
He missed two from the sideline, the previous week 8 from 8, nothing to do with his leg, he struck them all right, just not straight!
Doesnt have the ice in clutch moments. Have never seen him kick a crucial goal for us ever. Even when he was lining up the field goal we all knew he would miss.
Can’t disagree with the grades. I’m giving myself an F as well for walking past my own car twice trying to find it on a dark street after the game.
Agree that RCG and Niukore put in. The Tiges copied the St George spoiling game plan from last year but the ref blew the whistle this time, which indicates how far off the pace we were today. We were given a soft start then mentally adapted to it.
Thank you for the laugh after our long trip home. That game was yuck. The worst part is we really cannot blame anyone because they all had a shocker, including the coach. I spent the game like many shaking my head at almost everything. From this huge BA supporter his grade for this game also is a F. Oregon is not and will never be a starting prop, and if you don’t have enough faith in Haze then don’t pick him. With Marata on the bench or in the starting pack you don’t need to carry an outside back.
Our bench selection was atrocious and confusing , as it has been most of the year and goes against everything BA and this team has built identity wise. We are a forwards team with half’s who play off that. Our kicking game today was diabolical.
Yep just yuck all round.
Totally agree Shelley, the bench selection and usage has been off the mark all year. Several games we have had bench players go unused, and if Opacic didn’t get injured I doubt Perham would have been used today either. Let’s not even mention Rein’s “contribution”. BA needs to be asked some serious questions here, as there seems to be no coherent plan around our bench selection. We all know it’s a 17 man game, not a 13 man game, and it feels like our bench selections at the moment are giving our opponents a leg up before we even take the field. Selecting only one middle forward on the bench today sent the message we thought the Tigers would be a pushover in the middle. Our guys played that way and the Tigers gave us the treatment we deserved.
Sometimes games go like that!!!.
I gotta say this cheered me up. Whilst I accepted the result, any game they play like that just mentally wrecks me for the day (2.30am with no sleep hahahaha). I don’t believe it’s panic stations but man does it suck.
As someone who is o/seas, this is hard to read but also amusing, and embarrassing. I always thought this game would be tougher than some thought…Maguire can coach and just doesn’t have the cattle as some of other teams but they seemed to play for him today and themselves.
I concur about our bench and also for not having a specialist winger out there.
To me our defence has been avg to say the least for the season and some games could have hidden this. Something is not right and i am afraid that we are showing ourselves as not a top four type team for the time being. If i am being honest our defence has been avg for a few years, and it has not been consistent, besides the late end to 2021.
This was so good I became a patreon. Absolutely spot on on all fronts unfortunately.
The physcology of the players is obvious.
That was the easy way to win and the grind is bloody hard work, every time they made a mistake doing this they say to themselves, this is easy, but they overestimate themselves, with a lack of precision in execution.
Papalli running out wide as he should as an edge, has little idea in setting up his outside man in a classical backline move. ……precision again lacking…..second half back to the grind, only trouble was with exception of RCG (then gone) it was only Nathan Brown and maybe Matto that commanded any respect, Makatoa is simply not a first grader, doesn’t bend the line or hurt in defence….last choice….Carty offers more. Wests of all things had ex parra players, Twal and Utoikamanu dominating but their no 12 Leuila was unstoppable, we couldn’t handle him.
So this is not coaching or attitude as much as ability without Junior/RCG , if these two are in the origin side we need someone to step up and identify themselves now….how is Greig going because short term he is our only answer.
I would consider swapping Reed now for Thompson from the dogs, it maybe the only thing that saves us at origin time. I believe Rein has more to offer than what we have seen.
Had same thought about Rein. He has twice made excellent dummy half scoots through the middle, you know, the classic smart catch-them- retreating only to drop the ball when he comes to the part about what-do-I-do-next? Hold the ball and he’s a genius(maybe). And Gutho, take note, hold the ball, it’s not the first time for you either.
Pretty much spot on Poppa.
With regard to Rein he has had that problem of dropping the ball for a long time I don’t see him able to remedy that any time soon.
As a fill in I guess you can tolerate it. However I would not like to be counting on him as first man up.
Does anyone have an update on Hand so far? That team did very well on Monday. Komolafe got a hat trick on the wing.
Well, I’m glad I made the trek from Perth for that game. I went to the dragons game last year too. Bad news is I’m going to magic round, so things won’t go well against the roosters. Seriously though, what an inept performance. No urgency and pushing the passes. Bloody hell! Oh well, on to next week.
West coast you must feel like walking back after that effort. Poor selections, weak bench and wrong attitude. To see a dejected Pricey in the stands sums it up.
WCE let me know next time you are coming over from Perth for a game, I won’t turn up at Commbank.
I will be in Perth to see my son and grandson’s first week of May. Have not held them for 2 years. The youngest is three.
What atrocities must we have performed in our past lives to end up in this special circle of hell reserved specially for Eels supporters?
Every f*cking time we have a game like this, where in the pre-match all the players and coach say the right thing ‘we won’t be taking them too lightly; we know they are desperate, we will be on our game etc’ only to go and execute the very opposite of what they allegedly said they were primed for, and wary of.
Is it a coaching execution thing? A collective group mentality? Lack of pride in playing for Parramatta?
I don’t know what the problem is, but I am oh so very weary of it.
Let’s look at the facts. Lost the game:
Unfortunately, I can think of no other club than the Parramatta Eels who would be capable of such a perverse feat.
Look at Manly dusting us up last year on the day after Bob Fulton died. That is a team digging in with pride in their club and jersey.
If we even wanted to remotely be within pretending distance of having any commitment to club spirit, we should have been ‘on’ yesterday out of any regular round game this season.
Was a nice long weekend with plenty of sunshine only to be ruined by the typical recurring nightmare of choking that Parramatta seem to be the best team in the modern league at.
I can’t help it though, regardless, I know I will be the same stupid rat in the experiment that keeps the touching the electrified piece of wire in hope of an elusive reward, and I will be watching again next week.
If I can take anything out of it – is that we lost by a point when Tigers played at 110%, and we were only at about 50-60%.
Can we also get a different goal kicker than Moses? He only slots them when confidence is up. Should have kicked that second one, and the wobbles also seem to have got him during the FG attempt. Need more consistency here.
Absolutely 100% spot on Chris. My first chuckle since returning from the game.
Hoped I would wake up this morning feeling less crap, then my mind went to yesterday.
Watching Greig,Cartwright and Rodwell show their worth in reggies, then reviewed the bench for NRL and also knowing Kaufusi has never stood up when needed, shook my head for the umpteenth time.
Kolomafe may not be in the top 30, but he is a winger, did his job and scored 3 tries, contained his opposite and actually showed he knew where to stand , defend and support as a winger.
Do they practice setting up for field goals, Mahoney runs around and doesn’t nail last plays at crucial times, can’t be an accident.
just needed to get this out, sure we are down on troops but continually running a drop off play from Drown to Lane and watching it fail, didn’t seem to alter the game plan or execution, expecting things to work when they don’t is a trait that ticks me off.
At the end of the day I still don’t understand not replacing Junior with another big body or a ball playing forward , not Kaufusi. Sure we are down specialised wingers, but older fans like me remember Gibson playing young players in specialised positions for a game of 2 to cover injuries (eg Hayne debuted in the wing for instance ) seemed to work then, why not try it.
A nights sleep obviously didn’t help to calm disappointment , on to next week with little confidence. Such is the life of a rabid Eels fan
Consistency, Maturity and Discipline are the things I reckon are still lacking with the group. When this team is playing against the Storms, Rosters Rabbits and Sharks, their discipline and respect to the opposition and the ball are very evident. But when they play teams like Tigers, Bulldogs and recently Titans, their discipline is nowhere to be seen. Brad and Moses mentioned it last night that they played the Tigers game. Maybe they really need a psychologist to change their mental attitudes.
How long til we realise that Rodwell is light years better than Oregon Kaufusi.
Id prefer they play Komalafe he is a specialist winger Haze is a fullback or half give the kid a go he might go to another level.Otherwise go out and pick up Jordan parrera at the broncs every game i watch him play its like he has spiders on him hard to tackle.
How can you explain beating the best team or second best in the competition and lose to a team running last. You can’t but for certain Parra has not got that ruthless streak. And losing two games on the bell plus winning one in extra time tells me they can’t close down a game. Is Mahoney trying too hard?
This is Brad Arthur’s loss. He is a train wreck with the bench and has been for the past few years. Four blokes on the bench and runs two of them for 15 minutes – it’s crazy stuff. Asking the players to give so much time on the field now and they will be wasted by seasons end.
Jake is back this week – on the bench. How is he a better substitute than Cartwright.
This selection must be influenced by someone.
Either that or BA is being outright defiant with his bench selections and rotations.
Why won’t he come out an explain his logic. Actually logic is not the right word. How about explain his thinking. No thinking that’s not right either.
Can BA come out an explain why he has screwed the team with his bench. Will someone from the club explain what and why BA does this because even all the fans can see that it is plainly wrong. Please anyone – provide us with some insight into this bench fiasco!!!
After a game where we are all cursing the low percentage options, your solution is Cartwright? 🤔
Don’t believe I said that.
My complaint is the bench and how it is used.
But I think Cartwright is better option than what’s been selected
Yeah sounds about right. I’d love to blame the refs, the occasion, the weather, SOMETHING. But in the end it was a team F for effort. About the only positive is that Penrith lost to this side last year and still won the premiership.
Tigers played like they were sick of losing – we played like we were entitled to winning.
And how we use the bench is a mystery – cannot work out the logic or strategy behind it with the minutes played or the players picked on the bench
With 20 to go I was sitting there saying to myself who’s going to put their hand up and win this game I was looking for Gutho or Moses our two marquee players to do something but in my opinion they both went missing.Instead it was Hastings who looked like Thurston out there he was best out there today.
Hate to raise the possibility and hopefully it isn’t true, but the way we played and with the Tigers paying $11 at kick off… did any of the boys make some extra cash on that one??