While it is a fair accusation that Parramatta and its fans often live in the past, I didn’t expect the 2026 Eels to send me back to the late 90s and the wild mood swings of teenage angst. Anger, elation, frustration, more anger, somehow all felt at the same time and at 1000% strength. That’s just what football can do.

The Eels were robbed and got what they deserved at the same time. In a season full of error riddled performances this was an anomaly, with quantity of errors eschewed for quality. On paper the Eels completed at 85% and only made 10 mistakes, numbers I’d kill for most weeks given what we usually get, but at least four of those errors were both basic and backbreaking, mistakes first grade footballers shouldn’t make in positions you just can’t make them in, while penalties and infringements were timed for maximum Parramatta pain.

Moses drops it cold in attack on the second. Volkman fumbles a dummy half pass ten out from our line. Moretti drops an inside ball cold with the line in sight. Kelly plays the ball forward coming out of our own half. That’s just the errors, then you have Penisini sitting on a ball carrier on the first tackle in the shadows of the posts, Kautoga stripping Cleary on the ground in the same position, and Edwards giving away perhaps the worst ruck infringement I’ve seen on the last. It is a testament to how good the Eels were playing that they could make all of these errors and be within cooee of the Panthers. It’s also what makes it hurt all the more. Penrith was there to be beaten. Should have been beaten.

And you could argue would have been beaten had the game been officiated by referees who didn’t need Labradors to get from the change room to the touchline. Two of the Panthers’ second half tries came off officiating mistakes that can’t be blamed on interpretations or inconsistency, it was just three people who failed at the most basic part of their job: determining if a ball went forward. Talagi’s dropped pass before Henry’s try has been a knock on for as long as I’ve watched football, a basic error that never gets the benefit of the doubt. The forward pass in the scramble the set before Jenkins’ try is most notable because the touch judge couldn’t have been more in line with the pass if he’d had surveying equipment. The Eels defended gallantly, a rare time they could do so well enough to cover their own multitude of mistakes, but they couldn’t overcome those made by the officials, too.

Yet flip the coin again and you have a team that ripped Penrith to shreds on the edges in the opening quarter but played against 12 men for 20 minutes and lost that period of football 6-0. They should have won but weren’t good enough to convert, they couldn’t get out of their own way. That the decisive blows were delivered courtesy of officiating incompetence hurts, but the Eels put themselves in that position through their own mistakes and their inability to take full advantage of early dominance and playing a quarter of the game with a man advantage.

We’ve got enough green shoots to run a vegan food fair, but it doesn’t help deal with the pain of losing a game we should have won. That it would have caused one of the biggest upsets of the year, against one of our rivals, just makes it that much harder to cop. Let’s see if the grades make me feel any better.

 

 

 

The Eyes (or maybe it should be Ayes) had a solid game, rucking hard, defending well, handling the Penrith kicking attack and having some moments joining the attacking line against a Panthers defence that was well prepared for his threat and marked him accordingly. It’s a sign of the modern game (and how much line defence we did) that Iongi made 13 tackles, but aside from a very average drop ball in a regulation tackle he was the definition of strong but not spectacular.

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Kelly’s rucking is among the best in rugby league right now, eating metres for fun against a defence that doesn’t give much away for cheap. He also made one of the most basic mistakes a player could make and didn’t play the ball properly, giving the Panthers field position they eventually turned into points. It’s his first howler in some time so I’ll give him a pass, and the magic he pulled to nearly score what I feel should have been a penalty try is more in line with Blue and Gold Brian.

We all know that NRL refereeing has tangled itself like cables behind an entertainment unit with ludicrously detailed decision justifications, but what planet are you on when denying a penalty try because of the presence of a defender when the guy who was obstructed still gets half a hand on the ball? How was the guy who didn’t get there in time for that going to stop the try if Kelly got there a step quicker? It makes as much sense as my 7 year olds explanation for why he needed to decorate his younger brother like a cake using toothpaste.

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Didn’t notice the beak too often in either good or bad ways, but he rucked hard, defended well and was error free against some very strong opposition.

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There was plenty to like about Will’s return from injury, but the standout moment for me is that stupid penalty he gave away to get the Panthers out of trouble on the first tackle. He looked like a 12 year old playing Halo, clicking the left stick over a vanquished opponent. There was no need for it, no benefit to us if he got away with it, all it did was take the boot off the throat of the Panthers at a crucial time of the game. Eels players should be all too aware of not inviting a referee to penalise them, and here Will not just invited Sutton in but made him a hot cup of tea with a freshly dipped bag.

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There’s not a lot of Ferrari to the Fox’s game these days, as the Eels struggle to get him into space and those looks where he was running at centre seem to have been torn out of the gameplan. He’s doing his best with what he gets, but he’s the star player of our three quarter line and is regularly given the fewest chances of them.

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The Panthers picked Volkman out in defence and isolated him several times, which is as much on his neighbours in defence to notice when Liam Martin might have him one-on-one a metre out from the line and get over to help. His options weren’t always the best and there was a noticeable difference between the speed and directness Mitch was playing with on the right side versus Volkman on the left. Fumbling the ball at dummy half on tackle one coming off your own line isn’t a great look, either.

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Mitch was back at his best in this one, playing fast, getting into the line and passing flat to barnstorming runners. He scored one try and set up the other two, put on a few more line breaks for good measure and worked hard to earn a sin binning for Isaiah Papali’i. His defensive numbers look far worse than the eye test suggested, and he was first man there to stop Jenkins scoring in the corner early on. He hasn’t reached these heights too often in 2026, but Mitch at his best is still one of the best. We just won’t talk about that cold drop on the attack early on.

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Flowers all round for the starting pack, who really got on top of the Panthers vaunted middle. I don’t remember seeing so many Eels getting to their knees through contact and earning quick play-the-balls, and to do so against the best defensive side in the competition was an almighty effort. Sam’s individual numbers were solid but hardly outstanding, but as the middle leader in a pack that achieved the impossible he is getting an A for effort.

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Tallyn was probing and took advantage of the early middle performance, but most importantly he got out of the way and fed his playmakers when we got to good ball. Not missing a tackle was a big plus, too. Unfortunately he’ll be remembered in this one for being concussed by getting the ball kicked into his head. Shame on Nathan Cleary for failing to yell “heads” as he put the kick up.

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Two tries, a lot of tackles, a lot of yards and no mistakes for Jack Williams, who looks at his best when getting the chance to run challenging lines on the edge. Hopefully there is a place for him in a hybrid edge/middle role in the future, though our best option right now might be to clone him and play one in the 10 and one in 11. For me the Thornett Medal race is neck and neck between Jack and Brian Kelly.

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I have little love for Kelma, but credit where credit is due he was very good here. There is no gameplan he is more suited to than “run at the left edge half” and in fewer minutes he was better able to pace his defensive workload, missing no tackles. He presented some real value off the bench last year as well, maybe this was the best way to use him all along.

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It must hurt for a hard runner like Kautoga to watch Tuilagi and Williams carve up the right side of the field while he runs into brick walls on the left. Special Ks did the best with what he got here, but the Panthers defended him well.

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Just the opening stint for Jack de Belin, whose numbers don’t suggest great involvement but I did like the look of his link ballplaying here and it was the first time it felt like he was a cog in the attacking machine rather than just out there to take the edge off a game. Given the inexperience of our side it is baffling he isn’t getting a bigger role, and it is hard to imagine this is what he was brought to the club to do.

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I don’t think this was Dylan Walker’s most effective game, but his time on the field didn’t coincide with our best attacking opportunities and the few chances he did get close to the line, the Panthers were well prepared for. If he’d been out there for the opening 20 we might have broken the line every set.

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I’m not too concerned about what else he did, that last tackle ruck infringement that led to the Panthers’ go ahead try was one of the most needless, backbreaking mistakes I’ve seen from a player in Blue and Gold this year. It was a killer. You can argue all you want about the consistency of ruck infringements, but that one was painfully obvious and as well timed as a fart at a funeral. In a game peppered with backbreaking Parramatta mistakes, this is the one that drove me to drink.

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Luca is another that had a stint very representative of the Eels in 2026. He made a clean break early on, then dropped an inside ball cold in an attacking opportunity. If we can just eliminate the basic mistakes, we’d be dangerous. Otherwise it was limited minutes for Moretti, and aside from that line break he was fairly workmanlike.

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Hoo boy have we got one here. Teancum is a big boy that loves contact and has a bit of skill and footwork in him too. He went nose to nose with the toughest pack in the comp and more than held his own, this was a performance that should excite Eels fans.

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Nope, not feeling better at all. Better that football makes you angry rather than depressed, I suppose, at least it means you were competitive enough to care. That hasn’t stopped my phone buzzing as Panthers fans gloat about their amazing victory. There remains no good comeback to “scoreboard”.

I’d say “at least we aren’t the Tigers”, but given they are our opponent next week I should hold off on looking down my nose at them until we beat them. If we play like this, or even better, play like this without as many killer mistakes, we’ll be hot favourites.

Until then, stay slippery, Eels fans.

Gol

Stats and images provided by NRL / Eels media