The Cumberland Throw

From The Stands – Negativity Ends Here

“ You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact it may be necessary to encounter the defeats so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it”
  Maya Angelou 

If I was to meet the Parramatta players, coaches or management I would apologise because I have made judgements on players and their effort and attitude based purely on what I see. The reality is what I see is clouded by my disappointment and, like many I need answers, I try to find them.

The truth is I know nothing about the players, or their lives. They don’t stop being humans when they walk on the field. I don’t know the game plan, unknown injuries or anything else. Yes I hate losing but I hate quitters more.

In the light of this, my message to the Eels players and coaches would be this:
I have faith in you.
I believe you are a good footy side.
I believe you care not just about your team mates but also this club.
I trust you will have the strength to come out the other side better for it.

However, this next message also needs to be crystal clear:

As long as you carry yourself like a defeated player or a broken team – whether it be by your talk on the field, your body language in the contest, your attitude in the dressing sheds or your comments to the media – you will remain just that!

Let the haters hate and the journalists spread gossip, nothing you say will change that. But, you must think positive, act positive, be confident and believe in yourself and each other. It is the only way out of it.

Simply, the negativity must stop and so from me it will.

Therefore, with the positivity being firmly on the agenda this week, what did I see from the stands that pleased me from that last game against the Warriors?

1) Manu Mau- Since the Raiders game Manu has stood tall, taken the criticism and moved on. He’s been an on-field leader, run hard, tackled harder, and showed immense pride and resilience. He’s reminded me and hopefully many more why he is so important to our team.

Manu Ma’u – so important to the Eels identity

2) Peni Terepo- He did what he usually does well – hard running and making metres. He avoided the handling errors and missed tackles that also normally spoil his game. He showed great effort and commitment, especially in the second half. When the time was toughest and we needed him the most he stood tall.

3) David Gower- A couple of weeks ago David Gower said “I always have had to fight for my spot.” Fight he did. Add to that running hard and straight with unwavering commitment and determination.

4) Gutherson- He was not one of the best on the field but one moment summed up Gutho and why he has so much leadership potential. In the first half he was faced with a decision with a bouncing ball on the ground close to the line with a Warriors player in toe. He put the ball out, backed his team’s defence and was rewarded – we held them out for three consecutive sets. He learnt from his mistake last week and made sure he did not make it again.

5) The fans – Those who turned up at the game, switched on the TV or radio or supported them in whatever way they could remain an important part of the club turning things around. We must stay the Blue and Gold army, a disciplined group all moving in the same direction if we want to win the battle. At this point we are the shield behind which our team can shelter so they can regroup. That is what an army is designed to do.

Finding the positive is my choice. I can understand the frustrations of Eels supporters and I would not begin to tell anyone that they aren’t entitled to feel this way.

In life, I believe that you should back people, show your faith in them and give them a helping hand when they’re lying on the ground rather than lay the boot in.

All these players above have bounced back from much criticised form, misjudgements, brain snaps and poor errors. I decided to acknowledge and celebrate that bounce back from certain players because they epitomise the qualities and type of people that will help my club rebound. Quite frankly, I have faith we will do just that – bounce back.

I trust BA. I trust he can and will make the correct decisions. I trust the players, their heart and desire. This choice is mine and I am sticking solidly to it.

Shelley

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Colin Hussey
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Colin Hussey

Shelley, why do you write great posts? I would love to see this given to the eels dressing room and read out to them, and garner their response, even in the dressing room they would have to acknowledge all you have said and look at themselves. While RL is a team game, and comprises 17 players plus the off field staff on game day, they are affected by both internal and external matters, the external ones are the hardest to deal with as they have no control over it, if possible ignore it and don’t let it gnaw away at… Read more »

Optimistic Eel
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Optimistic Eel

You can tell the negativity is getting to the boys in the middle. First half last week, mistake after mistake you can tell the pressure was getting to them. The body language showed it. BA somehow got them back up for that second half. He still is getting through to the boys and that little bit of fight keeps me staying positive and keeps me up to watch the boys. It is going to be tough on Thursday night. Noone does siege mentality like wayne bennett and they will be sure to have it following the bennett/bellamy circuis today. This… Read more »

DDay
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DDay

Great post Shelley. Thanks for the quote and reflection on the choice of being positive, it gives pause for all of us.

Let us hope the Eels carry themselves with an increased degree of self-belief this week and the result follows.

Parra Pete, Thurgoona
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Parra Pete, Thurgoona

Very good article AGAIN Shelley

Darryl Price
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Darryl Price

Great written article Shelley while I agree with some of the points with the article just not all of it for me. While I don’t think that I know what happens behind the doors at the sheds we have each week (outside of the first game against Manly where no one tried) only three to four players busting a gut for eighty minutes for me that is unacceptable. Mitchell absolutely last week especially busted a gut and a few times had the Auckland defence guessing and using the A option in attack to have them guessing but his B option… Read more »

Shelley
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Shelley

I agree there are some real concerns but I am just sick of going to the footy and feeling like I have attended a funeral. I think it is meant to be fun. Like you I have no control over the problems so I will leave them to BA etc to fix

Colin Hussey
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Colin Hussey

Shelley no one likes the loses but Its not helped when the loses are before paltry crowds, and unless those able to go the ANZ and call themselves supporters, even fans then its not going to help into the future.
I believe they will go better tomorrow night against the donks as the stadium will have a better atmosphere at Suncorp.

Anonymous
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Anonymous

Coreys the cancer in the middle , looks like hes undergoing chemo fri night .

Chiefy bo
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Who’s being negative ?
Discussing why the club isn’t performing as many thought it should isn’t being negative.

Pointing out where the coaching staff could have done better in the player market isn’t negative.
And why is it people use the haters word ?
Criticism of a coach or a player doesn’t mean they are hated, it is a personal opinion on where the club can improve.

Chiefy bo
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The haters call is only used by the so called do gooders. It dismisses themselves as the innocent party and paints the others as some sort of evil influence

Anonymous
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Anonymous

Get of the site ,you never support just whinge chief

Colin Hussey
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Colin Hussey

Cheify, that is taking the debate about negativity and positivity to another end of the extreme lineage. The problem is that so many are on the tipping edge of being negative that its actually a disease that is terminal. On the other side of the lineage are those that look at everything through rose of purple coloured glasses perhaps a tinting of both of them is what they order at an Sub Continent eye specialist.’ Thing is one cannot be at both ends of the lineage and have a balanced view that may tip you to one side of the… Read more »

Tad
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Tad

All the behavioural, Psychological, science on human behaviour would support what you are saying Shelley. Negative criticism—what does it do—Lower self esteem–lower confidence—lower performance—create a whole lot of variables which all work against human endeavour— Why do people stick to negativity? Unfortunately it is usually an expression of what people have learnt from there own upbringing on how to deal with life issues. You learn these types of things from those who bring you up—-some exceptions accepted. You generally learn how yo problem solve from your home ,peers, and your growing environment. Most kids develop to their full potential when… Read more »

Lady Eel
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Lady Eel

Now Tad you are getting way too smart for a footy site – you have led us into the area of emotional intelligence. Add resilience to what you have mentioned above and you start to understand why some people just can’t cope when things don’t go their way. Road rage is a classic example, but some Parra supporters’ have demonstrated a complete lack of resilience in the way that they have reacted to things not going as planned.
Love your work Shelley by the way.

Colin Hussey
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Colin Hussey

Lady Eel, Road rage in stands???? I wonder if that happens and it continues on the SM arenas as they troop out of the ground, (if they went) with thumbs going a million mph.

Realistic Eel
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Realistic Eel

Well you don’t have to worry about any negativity towards Brad Arthur from the guys who run this site. Our coach according to TCT is like Mother Theresa…..undeserving of any criticism whatsover!

Colin Hussey
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Colin Hussey

I think you need to change your tag based on that post, If you care to go back over almost every blog post for some months now, there has been more than enough posts that have commented on the coach, the difference though is in the tone of the replies rather than the name and cat calling elsewhere.